Granvilette Kestenbaum (GK)
GK: He fell on me at a party, and I thought he was the goofiest guy I had ever met in my life. He had these old stovepipe jeans on. And a pair of shoes, one of which had many, many, many rubber bands wrapped around it because the sole was coming apart. [Laughs]
Some weeks later, he called me. He said, ”Hello this is Howie.” And I said, ”Howie who?” He said, ‘Fine thank you. How are you?’ And I just thought, I can’t walk around with this guy! [Laughs]
So I wouldn’t date him. And uh, I lived in a girls residence on west eleventh street in the village. He would come down, sit on the steps, and, when I came out with a date, he would say, ”Hi. How are you?” And my date would say, ”Who is that?” I thought, this guy is really crazy.
But, the lady who was in charge of the residence said, ”Give him a date for God sakes. Get it over with.” So I went out and I said, ”I’ll date you.”
The next year we were married. And then for thirty-one years we were together. Maybe six weeks before 9/11, he started asking me, ”Do you love me honey?” And I said, ”You will always have my deep and abiding love.” And I don’t know why I said that. I’m glad I did.
That day, September eleventh, I got up with Howard at five o’clock in the morning. And for some reason we had a little tiff. He said when he left, ”I love you.” I was such a drama queen and I didn’t say it. But, I remember looking out of the bathroom window, he rounded that corner, and I never saw him again. People talk about closure. There is no closure when you lose a loved one. I don’t care how you lost them. The pain changes put it doesn’t go away. And, uh, I miss him like hell.